Time seems to be rushing by before my busy mind can even start thinking and grasping that concept! Today I realized that I am nearly 1/3 of the way done with college...I am a sophomore, and still feel like I am in my crazed days of the first month of being a freshman. It feels like yesterday, and yet it feels like a whole lifetime away, because in that small and quick amount of time, I have learned, grown and experienced so much. I love George Bernard Shaw's quote that, "Life isn't about finding yourself. It is about creating yourself." Because your whole life you grow each day, learn more and become a better person because of the life you have lived. There will never be a day that you find yourself, and are that same person you found until the day you die... Life is about creating yourself, and in creating yourself you find pieces of yourself that in the end create you!!! Does this make sense or are my thoughts completely tangled???
Sometimes I lay awake at night for hours with thoughts running at unimaginable speeds...It keeps me up for hours sometimes, no matter how tired I am. It can get quite frustrating, but its at those moments when my mind does its deepest thinking and, as my mom says, "my creative juices flow." I get these crazed concepts of life as I over analyze every aspect that came at me that day. And as I think of those concepts I start thinking of different paintings I could do that could represent the idea so much better than words. I don't paint anymore...like I used to in High School. I say I don't have time, but I do...I know I do. And because of that, there should be absolutely no excuse to me feeling envious of students walking around campus with a large art portfolio, its like they practically have a stamp on their four heads saying, "yes, I am creative, yes, I am an art student!" However, no more excuses for me not painting, because starting Saturday...I AM GOING TO GET PAID FOR PAINTING...and I am STOKED!!!
I get to major in MDT AND have an amazing job painting??
Life is so amazing, and God has blessed us with so many opportunities...
I am just taking every opportunity he is throwing at me right now and holding on to it as tight as I can. Have I mentioned yet that God threw at me the most amazing best friend in the world nearly 8 months ago?? Well He did... His name is Jordan, and I am completely in love... but that's a subject for another day! This post has gone on for far to long.
So today I feel like the little girl pictured above...
I feel blessed, happy, and at peace with my life. My life may not be perfect, I may not have my head on straight (which I get told by peoples faces every time I say I am a music dance theatre major), and no I have not found myself.... But I am finding new parts of me everyday, parts that I love, and parts that I need to change.
...And that's why i hate it when some people say they are not creative....EVERYONE is creative, because everyone wakes up everyday facing the world, themselves, and their challenges. There is nothing anyone can create that is more creative than a human being living their life to the fullest.
Picture courtesy of "pink wallpaper"